Forgiveness is transformative. It allows hurt and anger you carry to move towards healing andpeace. Choosing to forgive can prevent depression or anxiety from taking a stronghold on your mental well-being. That being said, forgiving someone who has deeply wounded you or
someone you love may seem impossible. Even the consideration of choosing to forgive can
leave you with thoughts of anger, rage, and bitterness-because that person who hurt me doesn’t
deserve my forgiveness! And that may be true.
Let’s take a look at the mechanics of forgiving, starting with what it’s not.
Forgiveness IS NOT:
● Forgetting the past
● Forgetting the pain
● Agreeing with what happened
● Acting as though it never happened
● Allowing that person to hurt you or your loved one again
● Letting the person “off the hook” for what they did
● Dropping charges when the offense is a crime
Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. It allows you to put down the suffering you’ve been
carrying and finally move forward without that weight, which will continue to be a burden,
otherwise.
Forgiveness is the acceptance of your suffering and your decision to detach from it, “I validate
the hurt experienced because of this person. It happened, it was painful, and now I’m finished
with hurting and release it. I won’t continue feeling anger or a need to punish, because then the
hurt is still in me, and that person still has power over me. So, I forgive to let the hurt go, heal,
and take my power back”.
In the book, The Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz stated, we don’t have to suffer any longer. First we need the truth to open the emotional wounds, take the poison out, and heal the wounds completely. How do we do this? We must forgive those we feel have wronged us, not because they deserve to be forgiven, but because we love ourselves so much we don’t want to keep paying the price for the injustice.
The beautiful thing about forgiveness is that you don’t need to tell the other person you’re
forgiving them. It can be a decision you make inside your heart-a gift you give yourself.
Want to learn more?
Reach out to us for a session, and let’s start your journey to becoming your best self.
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